I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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