I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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