I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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