I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
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