i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
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