I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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