It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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