I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
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