10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
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