4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
You're a waste of cheezeits
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
