Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
