singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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