I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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