I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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