I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
