i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Randomize
