38 yer olds are good kisserssss
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Randomize
