I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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