and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
