i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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