i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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