I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize