Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Randomize
