if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Kiss
Puke
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
bring money and cleavage
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Randomize
