just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Banned from zoo.
Again?
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize