Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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