I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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