I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize