love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize
