Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize