i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
