i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
