ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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