my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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