end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
