think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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