whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Randomize
