the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
A bitchslap is in order.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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