I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.