"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
She needs sedatives and a leash
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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