Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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