I think my vagina is haunted
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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