theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
The struggles of a small town man whore
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
