All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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