some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
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