if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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