I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize