He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
