fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
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