Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize